My Sanctuary

you know what's more stressful than not having any life goals? actually having goals because I can't help but freak out over everything because everything I do now seems to be failing horribly and just pushing me further and further away from what I'm trying to achieve and I just have so much to do now and no time and everything's so overwhelming like I don't want to disappoint people or myself but right now I'm really falling short of my own expectations and standards and I don't know what to do and on top of everything else of course there's always the constant threat of a relapse and oh fuck it all. I just want someone to come and reassure me that everything's going to be okay and that I can handle all this shit just fine. Because I sure as hell don't believe my own scant words of encouragement to myself.