so today I met up with my favourite people in the world.
we talked, had dinner, talked some more, and it was really nice.
on the way home, as I was sitting in the bus, just thinking about things in general, I reaffirmed once again just how much I love these people.
and I realized that they're one of the things that I'm truly thankful for in this world.
you know you read about how you should write about things, like make a list of what you're grateful/thankful for so that you can better appreciate them and be a better happier person etc etc. but I never really got the hang of that, never really saw the point so I never could get into it.
but today, on that bus, I realized just how thankful I was to have them.
just thinking about it, if I'd offed myself 6 months ago like I so desperately wanted to at the time, I never would have been able to meet them today.
sure, I wouldn't have had to deal with stress from university and the stress that naturally comes from the uncertainty of life and the future,
but then, I also never would have been able to see one of my best friends attached and so happy, never would've been able to see another best friend make such progress in pursuit of her happiness, would never have been able to assure another best friend that I'll be there to support her in her times of trouble, never would have been able to come out of that veil of darkness.
this is one of the times when I am truly thankful to be alive,
when I realize that there is so much more to life that I have yet to but want to experience,
thankful that I made that hard decision months ago to soldier on despite everything telling me to end it.

I am so, so thankful to have met you all.
you all make me happy that I'm alive.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Today I want to express my gratitude for whatever coincidence or whim of fate that saw me paired up with my current partner for my research project. Okay so technically we're each doing separate projects and all, but we still need to work together a lot to create materials for the experiments, coordinate information, and bond over our mutual suffering. It's true I've been more sociable this semester, but there are still precious few people that I actively like and seek to spend more time with outside of routine, unavoidable interaction.  I guess I'm just marveling at the new found fact that I can, indeed, find people I like and want to hang out with. To tell you the truth, I'd been a little worried recently at my inability to maintain friendships. I mean, I do have my core group of close friends whom I love to pieces, but beyond that, nothing. Not since secondary school have I managed to actually keep friends I made. I either cut people off or let them
Read more
went to the anime festival today. or rather,yesterday, seeing as it's already past twelve. the highlight of the day was the unexpected visit to Hershey's Chocolate world. freaking giant bars of chocolate and Hershey's kisses stacked everywhere, how could I resist???? the only problem is, WHY ARE THERE NO GIANT BARS OF THE COOKIES AND CREAM CHOCOLATE?????? the giant bars of chocolate only come in milk or dark chocolate,which,granted, is delicious as well, but still, WHITE CHOCOLATE(if you're about to write some stupid comment about how white chocolate isn't really chocolate, shut up) yes, the anime festival was a disappointment. oh, and you may have noticed that I no longer have a tagboard. HAH. too bad, I hate tagboards, just that I succumbed to peer pressure and got one the last time, but no longer, DOWN WITH TAGBOARDS AND VAPID SHALLOW TAGS, if you got something to say about my post, tell me personally or write a freaking comment, except that i just realized that
Read more
Another semester over. Well, almost over, just finals left and it'll be done. In the midst of all the stress and whatnot, I often forget to be grateful for all the good things that have happened this semester, and sometimes I get so caught up in my thoughts going round in a destructive spiral that it seems as if nothing good did happen. But they did. I have definitely been a more functional and socially adjusted member of society this semester. In fact, I do believe that this was the semester where I've been my most sociable, talking to new people, making new friends, trying out new experiences and actively working to change my dysfunctional thought patterns and behaviours. This semester has been even busier than the last (a thing I did not think was possible), and I probably took on more work than I was prepared to handle. There were so many times when I was consumed by stress, overwhelmed by expectations and my still crippling fear of failure (I'm trying o
Read more