you know, believe it or not, there once was a time when I was actually genuinely interested and passionate about mandarin. sure, it was only a brief window of time, but it existed. it was at the end of 2004 to the middle of 2005. I'd just got back from a family trip to Tasmania. my mum's friend had come with us on that trip and she'd brought along DVDs of old chinese movies, like 'Dream of the Red Chamber', 'The Kingdom and the Beauty', 'The Three smiles' 'The Love Eterne' etc. it's funny but I really liked these shows, and many more, and so for some time I really wanted to improve my own command of mandarin. I still like these shows, and occasionally do still watch them. I guess the reason I miss Korea so much, is that it was an escape from reality, it represented freedom, and happiness a time that was without burden and worry. Jia Min is always telling me that Pisces people like to daydream and escape from reality. well she's right.
Posts
just finished baking brownies for tomorrow's(or rather,today's) Christmas celebration. thinking through the events of my most recent holiday in South Korea, and comparing it with my trip to Japan earlier this year, I realize that my feelings fluctuate as the holiday progresses. I shall call this the "Holiday Feelings Curve", based on a 7 day tour of a foreign country. Day 1: YIPPEE YAY YAY YAY I AM SO EXCITED TO BE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY!!! Day 2: This is so fun I love this place so many different sights and sounds!!!!! Day 3: Why do I always have to wake up so early???? I hate this place I regret coming here, I want to go back to Singapore now!!!!! Day 4: Hmm...Okay fine, I guess I could get used to this place, it isn't so bad after all... Day 5: Lalala~ I kind of like this place.. Day 6: OMG 1 DAY LEFT??? NONONONONONONONO I LOVE THIS PLACE I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK!!!!!!! Day 7: Back in Singapore already???? WTF NOOOOOOO (starts whining and ranting about Sin
I don't feel like doing much nowadays... the computer is a bad influence. I really need to stop snacking after 12am. and maybe start sleeping earlier...well maybe... it's too fun waking up in the late afternoon though, that way I feel better about staying at home on the computer when I should be outside enjoying the fresh air because most of the day's already past, the sun'll be going down soon...it's just...a lazy time of the day. well, my kuroshitsuji wall scrolls are up and they look beautiful, my room is almost done, except for a cupboard which my mum assures me she'll get...when she's in the mood. I guess I should think about going to sleep soon.
musings of a half sick sarcastic bitch in an ironically philosophical mood at 1am
it seems that every time I'm sick I seek solace in the comfort of the written word. these past two days when I was sick, I simply curled up in bed with my books and just read. it's been so long since I'd done that and I miss it. nowadays I'm usually too occupied with the internet to really sit down and read for a prolonged period of time. but alas, the clock is ticking and dark days are fast approaching... oh that I could skip ahead to next wednesday when I'll have nothing else to fear! on another note, my nose is running like a broken sink, I wonder if that's a legitimate reason to skip training? But I kid, why would I even want to? the wondrous joy of the game, the exhilarating rush of adrenaline, the extraordinary sense of camaraderie and the unbelievable sense of satisfaction I get is enough to spur me on and inspire and instill within me the heart and soul of a sportsman. If I was not convinced before I am now. I wonder at how long it's taken me to disc
I love rainy days. rainy weather = lazy weather which means I don't feel guilty about vegetating in front of the computer all day long because hey, it's not like I can go outside and commune with nature or something. I am definitely in the holiday mood, and I think it's unrealistic for teachers to expect us to actually do homework now. I mean, it's bad enough forcing us to come to school and sit through boring lectures, they should be grateful we're even turning up, let alone expecting us to do work????? Pffft.
I saw christmas decorations while out shopping today. remembering it now, reminds me that Christmas is (sort of) near, which also reminds me that the year is coming to an end. listening to Kat-tun's 'White Christmas', while reading through kamichan 's old blog posts, and reminiscing about Hey!Say!Jump's four year career has put me in a nostalgic mood. I know it's a a bit early to be writing a "yet another year has passed" post, and yet, just like that, another year has indeed passed. this time last year, the celebrations for the end of O'levels had barely even started now? I'm thinking about how I'm going to have to really buck up for next year's A'levels. I can't believe I actually survived one year in jc and came out, well, not totally unscathed, but at least in one piece. I still remember the euphoria, the excitement, the relief, and later, the anxiety, the fear that comes with change, that comes with the beginning of a new
what better way to celebrate the end of something as serious as PW than by treating myself to a shopping spree of anime and manga goods at this year's AFA? I sincerely regret all the wasted years when I didn't go early. Because it is definitely worth it. I also regret not bringing more money with me today. some would say that I'm wasting my money on frivolous items of no real use, and to that I would like to say : Stuff You. because 4 wall scrolls and more later, I am a happy girl. And happiness, as they say, is priceless. p.s am sorely tempted to go back tomorrow to blow more money on more stuff but I shall resist
PW IS OVER
no words can express my joy re-watching Sweeney Todd: the demon barber of fleet street I know it's just a movie, but I am still amazed at how Anthony immediately starts planning to kidnap Johanna after seeing her ONCE. Oh but apparently he "means no harm" Yeah right, after he keeps going on about how he's going to "steal her" and how he "feels her". I'm sorry but that just seems creepy to me. Okay fine, it is kinda sweet that he goes wandering around London looking for her to rescue her, instead of just randomly killing people. and the little boy is so cute! Up until he cuts the guy's throat. 1 week of glorious freedom...of lazing around all day, not waking up till evening and not sleeping till early morning, watching movies non-stop on funshion etc. I know I'm going to get bored soon and I can't wait.
Facebook does contribute to my happiness
I love how he looks so peaceful all curled up like that. I wish I could do that too.
Bibliography's a birch
time enough just to catch my breath before plunging straight into the next major project, when will this end????
take a chill pill
gosh,why do convent people take themselves so seriously? I am so fuming mad I can't even type properly and I typed out 'birch' instead of 'bitch'. like seriously,words can not express my incredulity and disbelief at their lack of...I don't know what to call it, ability to chill? To not dramatize everything? right, but I am the better person, just smile, pretend it's all right, and send them a very formal apology to throw them off. Birch.
I think I may have what it's called, an addictive personality, as seen from my binges on chocolate,crackers, toffees, coffee, and most recently, pistachio nuts. I apparently ate so much I developed a sore throat and almost fell sick. people with an addictive personality will "show impulsive behavior such as excessive caffeine consumption, internet usage, eating of chocolates or other sugar-laden foods, television watching, or even running" now with the exception of the running part, that totally tells the story of my life. so great, in the course of my revision for my exams I've just discovered a new disorder that I most likely have. (this was done through the use of the internet, which I tried to ban myself from by giving my laptop to my mother but which I can and do still access now from the desktop. Oops) see I used to think I had bipolar disorder, but then no, I found out that that's just puberty and hormones and stuff. but I really do think I have an addicti
bugger this for a lark
jc life has officially screwed up my sleep cycle like nothing before I sleep at odd hours of the night(sometimes I don't sleep at all-like today), nap at random times(my naps span 4-8hours) and my sleeping habits are now even worse than they were during the holidays(which should give you some inkling of how bad it is), the difference being that during the holidays, i was averaging 12 hours of sleep a day while I am now reduced to an average of 4 -5 pathetic hours of sleep per day. people, be warned- never, I repeat, NEVER take h2 history, unless you have the good fortune to have an extremely good, friendly teacher. Otherwise you're on your own and screwed. Or unless you happen to be some cyborg with photographic memory I guess. PROMOS ARE IN 1 WEEK HELP!!!!!
I have finally run out of things to do on the internet and must now face my History essay..... can someone remind me again why I ever thought history would be an okay subject to do at college level?
but first, my poor handsome,golden,smelly baby is HALF BLIND AT THE AGE OF 3!!!!!
okay, that might be exaggerating it a little.
his vision in unclear in his right eye. There.
butbutbut how can my poor baby fight with other mean nasty dogs now? What if they sneak up on him from the right and he doesn't see them coming because of his condition and because of that...IT'S NOT FAIR
I mean just look at him sprawling so majestically on the floor...
August special: Ways I fail as a person
1. Last Sunday, 19 000 people visited the Istana. 3 people somehow managed to lose their way and ended up wandering around Sophia road. Guess who was one of them?
2. It's been more than a year since I moved into my new house. On Wednesday I just found out that there is a papaya tree in my backyard...when my tuition teacher pointed it out.
3. This is the second time in a row I have forgotten to bring my graphic calculator to school for an important maths test because I spent the night before studying and left it on my desk instead of putting it in my school bag.
On another note, I like sitting in front during my economics tuition because NO ONE CAN BLOCK MY VIEW OF THE WHITE BOARD ANYMORE. Oh, and teachers tend not to focus on students sitting right in front. And since no one else wants to sit in front, I get the whole table and 3 extra chairs to dump all my stuff on.
chocolate explosion now that my dad's back....and hopefully getting Austrian chocolates from my brother when he gets back too? yeah, I seem to be riding on some new high happy chocolate wave of bliss combined with new performances by hey!say!jump, and a new chapter from kuroshitsuji, I am content for now I guess I don't need to take whatever drugs to get high, just give me cartloads of chocolate and I'm good.
you know what's horrible and depressing?(more horrible than all the projects and homework I have now i mean) having a brother that went to the exact same school taking the exact same subject combination...no wait, he had a HARDER subject combination, taking 4 h2 subjects, and knowing that he did infinitely better than I ever could, that he never once came close to failing or getting a U grade while I on the other hand am.....screwing up everything in every possible way.
yes, I like to have posts that just contain cryptic little phrases because I'm mysterious and shit. or, because I'm feeling more pissed off and impatient and bitter lately. I just don't have the patience to craft a proper blog post and honestly i don't know what to post either. what's the point? it's not 'everyone seems depressed lately', everyone ALWAYS seems depressed well what do you expect? exams have just passed and then oh yeah, you remember you have more exams in 2 weeks time and by the way have you forgotten? you're FAILING. how can chinese be my best subject? It has never in my whole life ever come close to being my best subject so that gives you an inkling of how horrible everything else is. horrible,horrible,horrible. that seems to be my new favorite word.
after a long day of school with damn cramps + anxiety(okay,who am I kidding? I'm scared shit out of my mind) for a'level chinese oral tomorrow, the one thing that brings a smile to my face is hearing the energetic angelic voice of chinen yuri! okay, I can't seem to find a more recent picture but never mind. his wide, sweet sincere smile never fails to lighten up my day. while watching his newest performances, the pain from my cramps miraculously disappeared, I felt so happy and contented and I was smiling stupidly at the computer screen the whole time. his voice seems to have finally broken....I think. I'm a big fan of kamichan , and thanks to him, I've been able to keep track of hey!say!jump's activities with ease. so just want to give a big THANK YOU for his tireless efforts ,and to let him know that his efforts are very much appreciated! sorry, I couldn't resist one more.
my gosh, I bought 3 pairs of shoes today! when was the last time I ever bought so many shoes? Oh that's right, NEVER. I love marks and spencer and I love shopping with my mum, she pays for everything:) I hate it when I'm trying to find a song on youtube and all I keep getting are fan covers! And bad ones at that! I don't want to hear wannabe singers trying to sing, I want to hear the actual song with the actual artist singing it. And don't frigging ask me to go buy that singer's album since I want to listen to the song so badly. I don't. I just wanted to listen to something new. fine. I shall go back to re-watching my anime now instead of studying economics.
just rebonded my hair, I can totally pull off that stupid demure look now.......if I was like 10000000000000kg lighter that is. I guess I forgot just how flat rebonding makes your hair look, I feel like I've lost half of my hair or something... but my holidays are finally here! well supposedly 1 week of holidays have already past, but since that week has been spent in school it doesn't count.
if I'd known how hard literature would be, I never would have taken it, I was better off sticking with maths. as it is, I can't do anything now but try to soldier on and hope for the best. the immense weight of homework is slowly but surely crushing me. the time between 2am-5am is when I feel most hopeless and at a loss...(why am I even awake at that time? Homework, what else) nothing in Deyi could have ever prepared me for JC life, heck even the times before O'levels were quite restful compared to the times now, the thing is, I was much more motivated then, I had a goal, I wanted to prove myself, I had people to do well for. now, I've lost all motivation. I find no meaning in my work, no sense of accomplishment even when i finish it, no reason to work hard, and so I don't. but then I feel guilty, so I try to do my work, and then end up getting even more frustrated with myself because I don't know how to do it, and then I decide what's the point, I might as
staying up late to rush holiday homework, so what else is new? I miss the good old days in deyi, since no one was doing school work anyway,we could hand in our holiday homework like one week or more(or not at all) after the holidays and it was considered normal. I blame the fact that I woke up at 5.30pm today.
so I've been sick for the past two days, and I just know that I'm going to be killed by homework when I get back. the only reason I didn't die of boredom was because.... Sebastian has been reading to me! and I think this is by far the best cosplay of Sebastian I have ever seen. I swear, I almost swooned when I saw it.
I thought I was a fast eater,until I met....my Tour Group JAPAN TRIP 2011 8th-15th January
*Extremely long post ahead, but I demand that you read it anyway, since I spent like 3hours uploading the photos.* Day 1: Got to the airport(terminal 1) late, so the rest of the tour group had already checked in and we didn't get to see them. Boarded the flight to Japan, flying there on Japan airlines. Flight is surprisingly comfortable,and the food is not bad. Day2: Nikko Arrived at Haneda airport,got our luggage, and met the Tour Group. So there are eleven of us, including me and my mum, and even now, I still don't know over half of their names. Tour Group: -Old couple on holiday -Family of 3 son is waiting for A'level results, his sister was left at home -Family of 4 younger sister is waiting for A'level results, older sister is already in university. -My mum and I -Singaporean tour guide who can't shut up Nikko Toshogu: some shrines and stuff( I couldn't really understand what the tour guide is saying since he's speaking mandarin almost all the time) the